Applying The Law Of Balance To Anger

anger

We are all very much aware of the law of gravity. It keeps us grounded on the earth. Gravity ensures everything returns to a state of balance. This is the law of balance on a physical level.

The law of balance can also be applied on a mental and emotional level, to the emotion of anger e.g.  Too many angry thoughts of revenge and animosity (hatred) inside our consciousness can emerge in two ways:

a) either externally as toxic, violent behavior, which will attract toxic, violent responses from others, or
b) if these thoughts are kept bottled inside, they will eventually, after a period of time, emerge as some disease or the other in the physical body. This is because our consciousness then tries to find a way to get rid of the mental impurity, which enters our physical body and restores balance to the mental and physical system, which has been upset due to the creation of the toxic thoughts, in the first place.

The above e.g. is an application of this law on a micro level. We can apply this law of balance on a macro level, on the world at large, where we watch groups of people, even countries exchanging negative energy. 

The same law can also be applied on a larger level. Each time a group of people transmit the negative energy of anger physically to another group of people – at that time,either:
a) one party is disturbing the balance temporarily, which will be restored sometime in the future, by the second party indulging in similar behavior, or
b) balance is being restored at the present moment (because negative energy had been transmitted from the opposite party to the first party sometime in the past). This balancing must take place, because it’s an unbreakable law. This is the law of balance.

This law that does not need to be enforced by us, the police or even by God. It is a natural law like other laws of nature. It gets enforced itself and cannot be broken by anyone. Understanding that this law is embedded in the human state of affairs at all times makes us careful and detached so that we don’t hurt ourselves with violent, toxic thoughts, when someone acts negatively.  We create these kinds of thoughts because we believe this is revenge that is justified. Also, knowing that anger that is radiated comes back doesn’t mean we don’t have any laws within society – they are required, but it helps us not to take the law into our own hands. We cannot force justice to take place before its fixed time. We cannot force the balancing of energies of anger. If we trying doing it, it is being egoistic and we only upset the balance of our energies as a result. Even to criticize those who try to take the law into their own hands is to take the law into our hands.

Positive Reflections For The Day are messages sent by the Brahma Kumaris. If you are not receiving Positive Reflections already and would like to receive it daily, from the Brahma Kumaris, please send an email to the email address awakeningwithbks@bkmail.org with – Subscribe – written in the subject.

Neutralizing Anger

What is a good neutralizer for anger? Peace you would say. It’s not only peace, but a combination of truth, peace and love, in equal amounts. Truth and peace are the two inner states, which never ever leave us. Both remain permanently within each one of us. We already know, inside our subconscious and sometimes even consciously, the truth about anger and we can call our inner peace whenever we want – it’s there to be used. But what happens in real life situations is that we lose awareness of what is true i.e. the truth that anger is harmful and the truth of ‘who I am’. And we also forget the practice of peacefulness because some negative situation or experience temporarily blocks our access to the peace of our heart.

Peace is also deeply connected with love and we all have experienced many a times that it is impossible to feel loving and angry at the same time. Both cannot co-exist. In fact it is love that is the healing balm for our heart, that we our self have stabbed and wounded by indulging in many anger habits since we were young. But what happens is that we search for love and peace from the hearts of others. That means we have not yet realized that we already have what we search for, within our own hearts. To heal the wounds of anger, which can be in different forms like irritation, resentment, hatred, revenge, rage, etc., it is essential to rediscover the truth of who we are and the peace and love of what we are.

Positive Reflections For The Day are messages sent by the Brahma Kumaris. If you are not receiving Positive Reflections already and would like to receive it daily, from the Brahma Kumaris, please send an email to the email address awakeningwithbks@bkmail.org with – Subscribe – written in the subject.

Freeing Oneself from Hatred

Rage has many offspring (children), such as hate, anger, intolerance, insistence, irritation, obsession, sarcasm (taunt), envy, the abuse of authority, impatience, the lack of forgiveness. Generally it explodes when we want to control another or when our expectations have not been fulfilled.

Hate destroys your concentration and kills the capacity to act with dignity and excellence. You hate by justifying yourself in the other. You had expectations of them and they have let you down. They have wounded you and broken your heart. You answer this wound with revenge. You have to make them pay for it. You think that way you will do justice. This hate keeps you tied to the person that you hate. Instead of accepting them, forgiving them and letting go of them, you tie yourself to them more, nourishing and increasing the pain and the conflict.

Can hate be justified? Can it improve things? Can hate be healthy in any circumstance? Hate affects your health; it poisons your heart, kills your inner peace and dries you of love and happiness; you stay isolated in your aloneness, filled with that rage.

Take a moment to reflect upon the last time that you hated someone. It might be difficult to see that your rage is created by no one but yourself. Although it seems that the behaviour of the other person is responsible for your emotional state, the truth is that the hate is your reaction. Each response that you create might be a conscious choice. You forget that you have the choice because it seems that the hate comes out of your inside in a natural way. In reality, you are allowing yourself to act driven by your automatic pilot, where your subconscious habits, which are based on your beliefs and your perception, influence, shape and control your conscious thoughts and actions. That is the sign of mental and emotional laziness; in that state, your intelligence sleeps and it is impossible to think with clarity and take precise decisions.

It is said, “It is impossible to get angry and to laugh at the same time,” Rage and laughter cannot exist side by side and you have the sufficient power to choose either of the two. Each time that you choose to get angry due to the behaviour of another person, you are depriving them of their right to be what they choose.

To free yourself from hatred, you will have to take four important steps:

1. Understand that hate is not healthy. When you have a feeling of loss you feel sad. This feeling of sadness, because of the situation, generally gets created inside you before the feeling of hate, anger or frustration. Understand your emotions by observing them closely.

2. Accept that you are responsible for your own rage.

3. The other is free to act as they like, you can’t change them, but you can improve your response.

4. Be prepared to observe, challenge and change the beliefs and perceptions that you base yourself on and that create your emotional pain. Some of these beliefs give force to your rage and block your learning. For example, when you think that it is good that you are angry, the belief is that to feel rage is the natural and normal reaction amidst certain situations. Another belief is that anger causes the adrenaline to flow in you and you consider that it is a healthy addiction, that it makes you feel alive, that having sudden surges of adrenaline makes you feel energetic and strong. You use any excuse to feel bad and, thanks to that excuse, your level of adrenaline rises!

Emotional suffering indicates to you that you have to change something in you, but you don’t change anything. You ignore the messenger and the stress that you create continues to grow. Finally, it turns into such a habit that, if you relax and de-stress, you feel uncomfortable! You have got used to your stress. Become aware of the need for you to evaluate your beliefs and their impact on your life. That way you will be more prepared to change and improve your habits. This is the first step to achieving it.

Positive Reflections For The Day are messages sent by the Brahma Kumaris. If you are not receiving Positive Reflections already and would like to receive it daily, from the Brahma Kumaris, please send an email to the email address awakeningwithbks@bkmail.org with – Subscribe – written in the subject.

The Three Root Causes Of Anger

Any time we sense irritation, frustration or anger emerging inside our consciousness, if we take a close look at it, we will notice we are fighting a war in our consciousness with one of these three: either with another person, most obviously or with the past or with our self.

We are at war with the past because our anger is always towards something that has already happened and looking at it we react emotionally which means we are trying to change it, which is impossible. Any scene that has taken place a year ago, a month ago or even a second ago cannot be changed. We may be completely convinced and we may believe we can. That’s because we hold this belief subconsciously. Somewhere and sometime in the past, we have picked up and absorbed the belief that the world and its circumstances should shape up exactly as we want.

When our internal desire of a certain type of circumstances is not fulfilled, or in other words something against this belief happens, our instant reaction is one of the various forms of anger and we tend to try and change the incident that has happened in a far-off past or a past that has just gone by. We keep replaying a revised incident, with words and actions that we would have liked and that suit our convenience and we also keep nullifying the actual incident or remain in a un-acceptance mode towards it. This is like fighting a war with the incident. We tend to do this inside our minds, repeatedly, even realizing somewhere deep within, that it is impossible.

We are at a subtle war with another person when he/she has done something which we perceive or judge to be wrong and our anger is an attempt to change them or take revenge. This is the second belief that is embedded very deeply in our consciousness that the world, including its entire people, should do exactly what we want them to, or what we think they should do. Perhaps we have not yet realized that it is impossible to control others and make them change. The lack of awareness and realization of this truth, which we will definitely realize at some point or the other, doesn’t let us become anger-free very easily. People will always make their own decisions and control their own actions, always. They can definitely be influenced, but they cannot be controlled. When our internal desire of a certain type of behavior from people is not fulfilled, or in other words something against the above belief happens, our instant reaction is one of resentment or irritation or frustration or hatred which are all forms of anger.

One of the most important attributes of a great soul is the ability to not have even a trace of desire for revenge inside and the ability to forgive someone who has supposedly wronged him in anyway. Don’t we all acknowledge that such an individual who has freed himself completely from all anger forms earns our and everyone else’s respect and deepest admiration, and we give him the medal of greatness inside our minds and even physically? So doesn’t that mean we intuitively know that this anger is an incorrect emotion and peace, good wishes and forgiveness are the correct ones, in harmony with the basic nature of the human spirit?

We are at war with our self when we fail to make the world do exactly what we want, or we believe we have let our self down. An e.g. of a war with one self is – Suppose you are standing in a queue waiting for your chance to arrive, only to discover an hour later, just when your chance is about to arrive, that the time for the counter to close has come and the counter has closed. You get upset, but with whom? Perhaps the person at the counter at first and may be with the other people in the queue and then with yourself, for not having found out the time of closing of the counter. There are two failures that make you uneasy here. First you failed to ask someone early enough, which would have saved you the hour time loss. Second, you failed to control your emotions of anger. Although you might not externally admit that you failed, inside you know. Because of these two failures, you then start to get angry with yourself. The thought pattern that goes inside your mind: to fail is to lose, to lose is to be sorrowful, to be sorrowful causes me to become angry, as you look for an external cause of your sadness which, in this case, is initially the person at the counter and the other people in the queue (who would have known the time of closing and could have told you). So you demonstrate to others your justified anger towards them. But deep inside you know it is you yourself that has made you sorrowful.

As the anger builds up inside you, again, after a while, you find someone else outside on whom you vent out your anger. You seem to feel better as a result, but it’s only temporary. The next time you become angry; interrupt the pattern of your anger by asking yourself two simple questions: Who are you fighting a war with? Answer: Yourself. Who is suffering the most due to the war? Answer: Yourself. And if your anger is directed at yourself for your own supposed failure then just tell yourself, “There is no such thing as failure, only a different result from the one that I expected and results are not going to be exactly as I want, expect or desire. That is a rule of the game of life.”

Positive Reflections For The Day are messages sent by the Brahma Kumaris. If you are not receiving Positive Reflections already and would like to receive it daily, from the Brahma Kumaris, please send an email to the email address awakeningwithbks@bkmail.org with – Subscribe – written in the subject.

Understanding The Inner Mechanism Of Anger

If we think, speak and act in an angry way, we leave an impression or memory of anger within our own consciousness which results in sanskara of anger to be born. Within the sanskara is the recorded emotion and experience of our expression towards the object of our anger. The object is a particular person or situation. If we encounter the object of our anger the next day, it will trigger the emergence the recorded anger from within the sanskara. We then deepen the sanskara as we express more anger, even if we only ‘think’ anger. The emergence of this emotional energy from within our consciousness then stops us from interacting in a positive way. It clouds our mind and confuses our intellect, weakening and distorting our thoughts, decisions and behaviour. This often explains why we find it harder to connect and communicate with certain people in our life. Essentially we are carrying a negative image of the other person within our sanskara from a previous interaction with them. And when we see them again it emerges the energy within the sanskara, which then influences our ability to respond to them.

Positive Reflections For The Day are messages sent by the Brahma Kumaris. If you are not receiving Positive Reflections already and would like to receive it daily, from the Brahma Kumaris, please send an email to the email address awakeningwithbks@bkmail.org with – Subscribe – written in the subject.

Anger Management

Keep a daily chart for one week for the questions below, the answers to which will help you manage emotions of anger, irritation, frustration, etc. more effectively. Review your progress at the end of each day and then at the end of one week. Having made your observations, make improvements for the next week. Keeping this chart for a month, will help you manage and overcome your anger much better.

1. During which event today did you get angry or irritated…even a little?
2. What was the type of your thoughts at that time?
3. Which negative thought/thoughts contributed to your stress the most?
4. What positive thoughts helped you to regain your calmness and composure?
5. How long did it take to regain your calmness?
6. Why did it take so long to regain your peace?
7. What would you do differently and more appropriately if the same scene happened tomorrow?

Positive Reflections For The Day are messages sent by the Brahma Kumaris. If you are not receiving Positive Reflections already and would like to receive it daily, from the Brahma Kumaris, please send an email to the email address awakeningwithbks@bkmail.org with – Subscribe – written in the subject.

Choosing Peace Over Anger

Making the choice of peace is a simple choice, which lies in the hands of each one of us, at every moment right through the day, every day. A lot of people would choose a world, the world out there, made of peace but spend most of their time remaining peaceless in their own inner world, and then in their next door world, i.e. in their personal interactions. A lot of us would prefer a life of peace and we try to shape up such a life, only to be influenced by the old belief about how it’s absolutely fine to get angry once in a while, without which it’s difficult to get things done. We also get influenced by those people around us who continue to get angry for the shallowest of reasons. These people could be either at home, at the workplace, in the friend circle, the world at large or people who do not matter too much to us but whom we encounter every day – at the vegetable market, on the highway, or even in the movies for that matter! Unaware of the root causes of their anger, all these people around us will find a thousand ways to justify it, and will keep continuing with the habit in their lives. Their emotional un-clarity is so deep and addiction to the emotion of anger is so powerful that they will probably laugh at the idea that anger is a negative emotion and is form of weakness or suffering. They will, on the other hand, say that peace is timidity and a form of weakness or suffering. So, if you do choose peace over anger in your life then you are also choosing to be in a state of power and becoming free from suffering as a result. However, after having made that choice, to experience it in every moment of your life, it is necessary to rediscover where your peace is located inside you, it’s true nature or essence, how to access it through meditation and finally how to use it or apply it in your daily life.

Positive Reflections For The Day are messages sent by the Brahma Kumaris. If you are not receiving Positive Reflections already and would like to receive it daily, from the Brahma Kumaris, please send an email to the email address awakeningwithbks@bkmail.org with – Subscribe – written in the subject.